Nobody wants war. Not really. We all want peace and freedom. Inside and outside ourselves.

Demanding, longing and even fighting for peace and freedom in The World seems a natural thing to do. But what that primarily shows, is that there seems to be no peace in our own inside-world according to what we think we see in the outside-world.  Most of the time we blame ‘the others’ for it. From that perspective we are not free in ourselves. We feel victimized and we are prepared to fight others for that freedom.

It looks like there is  not necessarily an absence of war needed to feel peace. There are a lot of people who feel peace in the opinion that going to war and killing others is an acceptable way to achieve peace and thus feel free to do so. Seen in a broader perspective, makes ACCEPTANCE that what brings freedom and peace.

Oh, come on, you might say to me. Get real! Don’t you see all the wrongdoing and injustice what is going on in the (outer) world!? We cannot accept that!?

It took a long time for me to realise that there is no such thing as an ‘outside’ world. For everything outside is perceived inside!  Through our own senses.  Seen through our own lenses. Heard with our own ears and compared with our own agreements of how things are or should be for us and thus accordingly felt in our own heart. When our heart is not in peace… we will never experience peace. From this perspective, we make victims of ourselves, by ourselves.

You might say now: “What? I see what I see, and I feel what I feel, and no one can tell me otherwise! “.  And that of course is true. But do you also realise that what you are saying is exactly what I mean?

You already might know that nobody will ever experience what you experience. Not even in any shared circumstance. But this is also true for ‘the other’.  Another one’s experience is not more or less valid than yours.  And we all react according our own believe system ( agreements) in  how to see life. We seem to forget that every once in a while.

An example about seeing: You might look at a painting and say… “What a beautiful painting “and it makes you feel like buying it. While another looking at it, saying: “What an ugly painting” and feeling resentment, because they would never want to have it hanging against their wall.  Obviously looking at the same painting but seeing and feeling about it differently.

An example for feeling:  Two kids outside in the snow… One is having a great time making an Igloo. The eyes and cheeks excitedly glowing with a big smile on the face. The other one just standing there, shivering, the lips turning blue and complaining: “I want to go inside, it’s cold! Two kids experiencing the cold and snow and obviously one temperature so differently. 

So now we are back at the statement: I see what I see, and I feel what I feel. Now you might question that. Is that true?  Really true?  Is the painting beautiful or ugly? Is the weather cold or ‘not so cold’?  The answer is: neither. They are what we make of them. If we don’t give our opinions, things just are what they are. Just a painting, just weather.  

 

One more example: A child, frustrated by his mother for not being allowed to do something he really wants, screams at her:  I HATE YOU!  The mother feeling his resentment towards her, feels guild arising and gives in. The child calms down, after a while, after being satisfied, tells his mother seemingly out of the blue that he loves her. 
Does that not look familiar to you?  Did you never had the experience, that in a fierce argument you ‘hated’ someone so much, but after a while, the love would come back?  And can you remember at those moments of frustration how your whole perception of that person had changed? No matter how beautiful inside and outside the person normally seemed to be, all you could see was an ugly person with an ugly behaviour, who filled you with resentment.  And then, when the emotional storm was over and forgotten, how you could look and see that inner and outer beauty again what makes your heart melt?

In both examples there is only one and the same person isn’t it? Yet in one moment we see a nasty person and feel ‘cold and bad’ and in the other moment we see a loving person and feel ‘warm and good’. In another context, the feeling could be cold and good or warm and bad according our opinion about the same other.
It is our opinion what makes us feel the way that we feel. If we change our opinion, the feelings change too.  

So back to Peace and Freedom.

Should we not fight evil and injustice and punish the ones who violate what we think is right? Could we not make a better world if we do so? Would it not be a better world if everybody thought and acted the way we do?
What we see in the world is wat we think of it. It either makes us fear or free.  And thus we act accordingly.

We can make the world a bit of a better place if we left out three ould’s in our lives.
The should, could and would.  They keep us from accepting the way things are. And the things always are the way they are.  Not how the should, could or would be.  
Accepting the things as they are, does not mean that you can’t change or avoid them.

Fire burns and is hot. Someone made a fire. You don’t have to jump in it to stop it. You can try to avoid it or try to put it out. As you know the best and safest way to put out a fire is with water or lack of oxygen (not with fire). But if you get burned, don’t blame the fire (nor the one who started it) and foremost, don’t blame yourself. Just accept it. For that’s the way it is in that moment.  The hardest thing and yet the most liberating thing is to acknowledge (endure) the pain but don’t give it your opinion in the form o the three ‘oulds’.  That will set you free and give you peace. Note that I use fire as an analogy for any kind of war. And that is very daring of me because I have never been burned in a fire and I have never been in a ‘outside’ war. I hope I never will but if so… I hope that I will be able to practise what I preach.

I don’t wish you freedom and I don’t wish you peace. I wish you acceptance. If you get that, you will have it all.

 With Love from Me